Believe it or not, attitude is everything. Our attitude represents the way we think or feel about a certain situation or a person. Of course there are good attitudes and there are bad attitudes. Good attitudes are considered “positive,” and bad attitudes are regarded as “negative.”
A person with a positive attitude endeavors to look for, and identify, the good in others and various situations even when at first it doesn’t appear that way. Having a positive attitude helps to reduce stress and makes a person hopeful about the outcome of various situations.
Much has been written on the subject of attitudes. There is also an abundance of quotes by various people. The Scripture has this to say about Christians having a Godly attitude in the home as well as in the Church.
“Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.” (1 Peter 3:8). Finally, all or you, doesn’t mean Peter is concluding his first letter here. He had been addressing individual situations earlier in the letter. And now he presents five virtues which Christians need to put into practice.
Firstly, have unity of mind. In other words, be of one mind or be of the same mind. This doesn’t mean we are going to see eye-to-eye in every situation. People will always have different personal opinions and views because we are individually different. However, we must show respect for the other person’s points-of-view and listen patiently with understanding to what is being said. Listening is most essential.
Unity of mind means oneness and oneness means harmony. Paul says, “Live in harmony with one another . . . Never be wise in your own sight.” (Romans 12:16). To be wise in one’s own sight means being “self-opinionated,” which in turn leads to self-importance. Living in harmony preserves relationships.
Secondly, sympathy. The first thought that comes to mind about sympathy is knowing someone who is sorrowful about the passing of a loved one. And this is totally appropriate. Sympathy means the act of being thoughtful. Showing compassion and understanding for another person’s situation whether in sorrow or other trouble. We can sympathize with others for a variety of reasons.
Sympathy is the feeling of care and concern for others and their situation who need help and support. The Lord Jesus is our great example of sympathy. At the feeding of the five thousand, the disciples asked Jesus to send the crowds away to buy food for themselves. Jesus responded “They need not go away; you give them something to eat.” (Matthew 14:15,16). There are many occasions where Jesus demonstrated sympathy to others.
Thirdly, brotherly love. The greek term for brotherly love is “philadelphia,” meaning “brotherly affection.” The Scripture says “Let brotherly love continue.” (Hebrews 13:1). Christians are exhorted to “Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.” (Romans 12:10). There is no room for jealousy in brother love. We should be glad and unselfish when others receive honors even more than we do.
Brotherly love is strong affection for other human beings, treating them with respect and due consideration. This kind of love is beyond sentiment and words, irrespective of personal choices and feelings. The very thought of what concerns my brother, concerns me, will inspire brotherly love.
Fourthly, a tender heart. Being of a compassionate, kind, gentle, and sensitive disposition to others no matter their circumstances. A tender hearted person is also described as “warm hearted.” This person freely reaches out to others and gives or shares whatever is needed.
A person with a tender heart is also a forgiving person. Christians are exhorted to forgive one another. “Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32). Forgiving one another is an absolute “must” for Christians. Absolutely no option here. On the basis of what Christ did for us on the Cross for our forgiveness, there must be a willingness on our part to forgive others.
Fifthly, a humble mind. This means common courtesy — that is, putting “others first and self last.” A humble mind is a positive quality in a person. It makes no allowance for self importance. Thinking of others in a positive manner can be contagious because it leads others to think the same of you in return.
In his commentary, William MacDonald writes: “It seems so proper that courtesy should be taught as one of the Christian virtues. Essentially it means humbly thinking of others, putting others first, and saying and doing, the gracious thing. Courtesy serves others before self, jumps at opportunities to assist, and expresses prompt appreciation for kindness received. It is never coarse, vulgar, or rude.” (Believer’s Bible Commentary, p. 2269).
It appears that little attention is given to courtesy these days. The trend appears to be everyone for himself and God for us all. A Christian with a humble mind will always seek to extend courtesy to others even when temptation tries to dictate otherwise.
May God help us to have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.